Incomplete Letter to a Maverick

Dear Senator John Sydney McCain III (R-AZ):

Were I in your extraordinarily unenviable position, I would keep my fake campaign fake suspended and simply admit to the American people once and for all that this campaign has been a sham of epic proportions and I would apologize profusely for so blatantly presuming that a large enough majority of Americans are so stupid as to not see through your every transparent move. Your campaign slogan would be entirely more credible if it read “My Pathetic Campaign First”. If you really wanted to put your Country First, you might have stayed the hell away from Washington [Thursday] when it was made infinitely clear there was no need nor desire for you to be anywhere near the beltway. You might have also considered ACTUALLY suspending your campaign like you said you would – this goes to the point of thinking the American people are stupid, see... It is not hard to find out if you are still running TV ads, still running operations at campaign offices across the country, still making political speeches on your own behalf. In the end, there was really no point in doing so, since you made absolutely no positive contributions to the proposed bailout legislation, in fact causing the GOP to fracture at the seams. The whole will he or won’t he show up for the debate charade was capital “P”athetic (not exactly very honorable in my estimation, mavericky perhaps, but not in a good way). Where’s the straight talk, Senator? My friend? Your performance in the debate was commendable, considering how low you set the bar for yourself. Yet you continued to mischaracterize and outright lie about your opponent’s positions and past actions (not exactly very honorable). You talked down to him and continually stated he did not understand or was too naïve, You presented absolutely no ideas for the future, only murmurings of the past.

P.S. I have stated throughout this general election campaign that if Barack Obama were to make just one of the numerous gaffes, ploys, misstatements, lies, cover-ups, campaign shakeups, etc. that have been the trademark of this McCain campaign, the junior Senator from Illinois would be dead in the water.